Taken a week ago. A long post sighs..

School 's life is still the same and i can only describe it

as hectic, very hectic, super hectic.

The English paper on thursday killed me.

Never in my life have i thought that English will be that

difficult. Well, only ourselves to blame because Mrs

Cross did warned us that it's going to be a very tough

paper. Let's just keep my fingers crossed and pray hard

that i'll not score badly...... (sighs)

.

Exams

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Seriously speaking i felt beatitude the minute i flipped

open the SS paper today. Hokay i confesssssssss i

didn't study a single shit for it except for the 3 case

studies that etched in my mind since the mid-year

exams. Oh yeah, chinese paper 1. I reckon that i'll

score higher this time round because it's the first

time in my life writing chinese words that i felt super

proud of! Enough of those... my prelims will resume

on the 12th, kicking off with maths. *cries*

There're no exams next week because our school

is going to have many events.

.

I'm sorry dad, i wasted your money.

The piano that you immediately bought for me

after enrolling 3 years back cost $4500?

but i left it untouched for months till weeks ago.

The Erhu you bought for just because i'm in the

erhu section cost $600 but i left it untouched for

months.

I feel utterly disappointed and disgraceful of

myself..... just barely 3 years ago i was the young

girl thats so enthusiastic in everything i do.

3 years later, i found myself a 16 yo girl still

not studying for her exams.

To add on, i felt so redundant today during

Co. What the hell is this sectional leader doing?

All the juniors she taught before is performing

for Co why shes not? that's exactly what i

mumbled to myself today. I felt lousy....

I couldnt do anything to help. All i could do

was just looking at the back while they're performing.

Wanzhuang asked me to teach her Canon today.

yes, i'm able to play but it sounded downright

awful. It wasn't like that a year ago....

Just merely a year ago,

Eileen played proudly for Prss Co

Eileen was in love with her erhu

Eileen was so happy with her friends

On the flip side,

Eileen was never sitting down studying.

Eileen hurls vulgarities everywhere.

Eileen was among the last in class.

.

So what exactly have gotten into me now?

Idk.

Everything is differing from what i thought

it would be. I wonder how many of you will

be understanding this post....

9am-12am tomorrow, Poa rememdial in sch.